Madeeha Syed

How Excessive Use Of Social Media Affects Parent-child Attachment

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Overview

Social media has become an integral part of our lives, especially in the last decade. It has become a platform for people to connect with each other, share their lives and stay informed about current events and, most importantly, memes. The Covid-19 pandemic pushed us further to find refuge in the arms of various social media websites, whether it&rsquo;s Twitter for the daily dose of discourse, Pinterest for your manifestation boards or Facebook for its marketplace, social media has everything we could ever need. No wonder then that many of us don&rsquo;t feel the need to have a life outside of it. Certain people feel completely fulfilled by it. Some parents also don&rsquo;t mind pushing an iPad under their kids&rsquo; noses to stop an unprecedented tantrum from ruining their day. Well, it turns out that excessive use of social media can have a negative impact on parent-child attachment. 
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Negative Impacts

Parent-child Attachment refers to the bond between a parent and their child. It is a vital component of a child&rsquo;s emotional and psychological development. The quality of the attachment determines how the child will form relationships later in life.&nbsp;

By now, we are all aware of the various attachment styles derived from British Psychologist John Bowlby&rsquo;s &lsquo;Attachment Theory&rsquo;. This theory has been much researched, built on and expanded and has had a substantial impact on how we view human relationships. This is the idea that children are born with an inherent need to bond emotionally and physically with at least one of their caregivers and develop attachment styles based on the response they get from these figures. This happens during the first six months of infancy and sticks with a person throughout their life. Our attachment styles essentially decide how we are going to relate to ourselves, our peers, our lovers and even our colleagues.

The excessive use of social media can lead to a decrease in the quality of parent-child attachment. Parents who are constantly on their phones or computers are not giving their children the attention they need. This can lead to the child having feelings of neglect and abandonment, these kids end up feeling like their needs are not a priority and this can cause long-lasting harm to the child&rsquo;s mental health.

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Here are some of the ways your excessive use of social media is harming your relationship with your child:

<ul>
	<li>Distraction From The Child: When parents are constantly checking their phones, they are not giving their children the attention they need. When the child eventually figures this out, they feel neglected and can withdraw emotionally. Now, you&rsquo;re going to need double the effort if you ever do try to connect with this child. As they have learned to not bother you from very early on. 
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	<li>Reduced Interaction: Excessive use of social media can reduce the amount of time parents spend interacting with their children. When you&rsquo;re busy checking how many likes you have on your latest tweet, you&rsquo;re not listening to your child tell you about their day. You also don&rsquo;t have time to engage in playtime or bedtime reading with your kids. 
	&nbsp;</li>
	<li>Increased Stress: Parents who are constantly checking their phones may become more stressed, which can affect their interactions with their children. The constant barrage of information and disastrous news can affect the parent&rsquo;s emotional well-being which means they don&rsquo;t have enough capacity to engage with their child in meaningful ways. Many parents become short tempered with their kids as a result of all this and this affects the emotional well-being of the child. 
	&nbsp;</li>
	<li>Modelling Negative Behaviour: Parents who are always on their phones may be modelling negative behaviour for their children. Children learn by observing their parents and if they see their parents constantly on their phones, looking for the next dopamine hit or using social media as an escape from reality, guess what they are going to learn to do as well?&nbsp;</li>
</ul>

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Conclusion

To avoid all of this, parents should limit their use of social media. They should set aside specific times during the day to check their social media accounts and should avoid using social media during times when they are interacting with their children. Parents should also try to engage with their children in meaningful ways. They should spend time doing activities together, such as playing games or going for walks. These activities provide opportunities for bonding and can strengthen the attachment between parents and their children. To raise well-adjusted kids, we as parents have to be well-adjusted as well.&nbsp;

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